Weight: 249.2
No change. I wanted comfort food yesterday because I was afraid and upset. Emotional eating is a part of my life. I don't know if this will ever change. I guess I don't like it when my husband "mr. doomsday" is in the house all day or even part of the day. I dreamed last night of being in my very own house. Maybe the trick is to figure out how to step away from the doomsday reports. Nah.
So I ate a whole dark chocolate bar and then had creamy salad dressing on my chicken salad last night. Also had two hands full of semi sweet chocolate chips.
I am NOT hungry when I do this. Emotions.
I remember one of the books I had to read for therapy had the opening line, "You are only as fat as you are dishonest." Now, if we're being perfectly honest, I never got past that first sentence. It horrified me. I felt like it was blaming me for things I was hiding at the time (that had nothing to do with eating). It took me many years to realize that the book was not talking about secrets we're keeping from others, but secrets we are keeping from ourselves. This has to do with being afraid of failing -- in our lives, in our marriages, in our every endeavor. So we lie down in the road and let mr. doomsday and the OF run back and forth over the top of us with cleated shoes.
ReplyDeleteNow that I'm done blabbing about that, I have to admit that I have no idea what the solution is.